I am too alone in the world,
and yet not alone enough
to make every moment holy.
I am too tiny in this world,
and not tiny enough
just to lie before you like a thing,
shrewd and secretive.
I want my own will,
and I want simply to be with my will,
as it goes toward action;
and in those quiet,
sometimes hardly moving times,
when something is coming near,
I want to be with those
who know secret things
or else alone.
I want to be a mirror for your whole body,
and I never want to be blind, or to be too old
to hold up your heavy and swaying picture.
I want to unfold.
I don’t want to stay folded anywhere,
because where I am folded, there I am a lie.
and I want my grasp of things to be
true before you.
I want to describe myself
like a painting that I looked at
closely for a long time,
like a saying that I finally understood,
like the pitcher I use every day,
like the face of my mother,
like a ship that carried me
through the wildest storm of all.
~ Rainer Maria Rilke Rilke's Book of Hours: Love Poems to God